Vulnerability: Be Seen
Some 5 years ago in Los Angeles, at a time in my life when I felt isolated and unappreciated I first reached out onto the Internet for connection on social networks. My self esteem was in the gutter, whatever gains I made just seem to dissolve away. Projecting a digital version of myself was a tiny step toward walking out of the shadows.
In time, I reclaimed the very much social life I had sacrificed to be with someone anxious, self hating, and jealous. Little by little I have revealed more of my attitudes, thoughts, and creativity in person and online. I’ve come to realize that the only way to dissipate my own fears is to be transparent and share without reservation. This experiment has resulted in cultivating relationships with people who are so likeminded that it is as if I have discovered secret siblings. Only by expressing myself authentically have I been able to magnetically attract people who are similar to me.
So imagine how comforting it was for me to watch Brene Brown’s Ted Talk “The Power of Vulnerability.” She’s an empiricist who seems to have put some solid research into abstractions I’ve been noodling on for quite some time. She has some very interesting observations that I’m still contemplating:
“Shame is easily understood as the fear of disconnection..”
“There was only one variable that separated the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging and the people who really struggle for it.. and that is that the people who have (it) believe they are worthy of love and belonging.. that’s it.”
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of joy, creativity, of belonging, of love..”
”Blame is a way to discharge pain and discomfort”
