A Life Revealed One Post At A Time

My ex never wanted to be connected on Facebook, his excuse was that it’s not real, not important.  It’s probably never a good idea to take what other people think too seriously, but I disagree with his position that it doesn’t matter.  He never unlisted himself as single, despite how easy that is to do.  Facebook is a storytelling tool.  It does broadcast your life in some meaningful way.  It tells your peers, coworkers, and family what is going on with your life through your activity or lack thereof. I’m not saying that it should but it does in this day and age.  And when there’s an ex who’s actively trying to weasel his way into your boyfriend’s life, and he’s still connected with him on Facebook, little things can be very symbolic.

How to Overthrow Society

Fable III is gorgeous, and just another reminder that it’s not a good time to be a multimillionaire (much less a billionaire).  The oligarchy had better get pr spinning in their favor before the guillotines are dusted off..

Love Ain’t Enough

He says he misses me.  Obviously I miss him.  Are feelings alone worth maintaining a relationship?  I honestly don’t know, I guess that’s what a lot of this is about.

I need to take care of things in my life that on their own are obstacles to a long term relationship.  Yet even if I get my act together tomorrow, I think there are plenty of reasons why another try should be postponed.

Despite his words and the feelings he expresses, I can’t forget all the downslopes on the rollercoaster.  When pressured, he was all too eager to break up.  I also can’t forget the invisible ex in the room.  He may not have been able to stop him from text messaging or calling, but he didn’t have to keep responding to the manipulation.  It’s not like he didn’t realize how devious his ex is.  Then there was the nagging, the nitpicking, and focus on all the negative.  I can’t help but feel like the best course for him is to spend some time being independent, get his ex out of his life, and figure out what makes him feel so agitated and unsatisfied and do something about it.

I know that I am long overdue for a self overhaul.  I allowed myself to be distracted by the problems in other people’s lives for too long.  It’s so much easier to focus on everyone else’s house than my own.  I get joy from being of service and my own issues and challenges seem to boggle me.  I don’t know how to help myself.  I dream big but I’m content with much less than what I can probably accomplish.  The end result is that I’m not fueled by the same emotions and motivations that drive most over-achievers.  Good company, some laughs, and something new to learn are all I really need to have a happy life, and all are usually within a short reach.  There’s no carrot I can make myself chase.

I don’t think I’ll be over any of this any time soon, I just hope that I can have a little more focus.  I need forward momentum if I want to make it back to the Bay.  To do that I need to stop juggling so many different things, I need concentration, but at the moment I’m still too overwhelmed by emotion.  I hate having a big squishy heart.

So regardless of how I feel right now, love ain’t enough.  We can’t even have another shot at it until time has passed and we take care of ourselves.  That really doesn’t make it any easier.  It still stings, but enough is enough.  Now is the time to be practical.  I need to direct my attention to matters of necessity and so does he.  Right now the world has no patience for human frailty.

Back to the Tardis

“Doc? You look like you’ve changed a bit..”

Track Fail Set to Radiohead’s “Creep”

She may have won the tin medal in track, but she made Internet GOLD for the rest of us to enjoy..

I Wantz: Samsung Galaxy Tab

It’s been a long time coming.  I was an early adopter with tablet PCs and Palms, and practically anything else that had a touch screen except the iPhone.  The hype was sufficient enough for me to wait for the 3G model.

I might still wait on the Galaxy, I do kinda want something small enough to always be pocketable and with me like a mobile device, but it would be nice to have an alternative to carrying around a laptop.  The Samsung Galaxy would seem to be an answer to that desire.

It’s greatly improved over the iPad, smaller, but with an OS designed to make the screen space feel more roomy.  It also has the benefit of running Google Docs on it, my portable office for both my fiction writing and my freelance work.

Not convinced, read this comparative review on the next web